L’interprétation de Mark Gomez sur « controlled male chastity »
Cette vidéo a été publiée par Mark Gomez sur YouTube
portant sur « controlled male chastity »:
[embedded content]
Cette vidéo suscitait de l’intérêt au moment où nous l’avons trouvée. Le compteur de Likes indiquait: 3.
La durée (00:27:08s), le titre (Chastity Day) et les informations de l’auteur sont des détails importants à considérer, tout comme la description :« ».
YouTube est une plateforme largement utilisée pour partager une variété de contenus vidéo, permettant aux utilisateurs d’explorer des sujets divers, y compris ceux relatifs à des désirs, des idées créatives ou des perspectives uniques. Grâce à ses outils, YouTube offre un espace sûr pour découvrir des vidéos enrichissantes tout en respectant la confidentialité et la sécurité des utilisateurs.
Les bienfaits de la chasteté incluent un impact significatif sur le bien-être personnel et moral. Examiner l’influence de la chasteté sur le bien-être personnel et moral.
La chasteté pratiquée avec attention a une influence majeure sur le bien-être personnel. Cette pratique permet d’atteindre une plus grande maîtrise de soi, une clarté mentale accrue, et une paix intérieure qui découle du respect des valeurs morales. La chasteté aide à établir une relation plus équilibrée avec son corps et ses désirs. Grâce à la maîtrise de soi, la chasteté permet une liberté accrue en éliminant les pulsions et les pressions sociales sur la sexualité. La chasteté assure un sentiment de pureté morale, améliorant la dignité et l’estime de soi. Les bienfaits psychologiques liés à la chasteté sont particulièrement évidents. La pratique de la chasteté permet de renforcer la confiance en soi et de faire face plus efficacement aux défis.
Mesurer l’influence de la chasteté sur les relations avec les autres et les relations au sein de la famille.
La chasteté apporte des améliorations dans les relations avec les autres. Avec une cage de chasteté, un homme restaure ses aptitudes séductrices et change sa façon d’interagir avec ses partenaires. En raison de leur utilisation plus rare, les capacités physiques et sexuelles sont particulièrement puissantes durant l’acte. La pratique de la chasteté peut se faire discrètement, sans la nécessité de partager ce secret avec ses partenaires. La chasteté peut, au sein du mariage, renforcer les relations entre les époux en encourageant un amour plus profond, loin du plaisir charnel.
Saisir le concept de chasteté dans le cadre contemporain. Définir et comprendre la chasteté dans un cadre contemporain.
La chasteté, en essence, représente la maîtrise de soi dans le domaine sexuel. Au-delà de l’abstinence, la chasteté implique un contrôle volontaire des désirs sexuels dans un cadre spirituel. Dans le contexte actuel, la chasteté ne se réduit pas à supprimer les désirs, mais à les diriger vers des buts supérieurs comme le respect de soi et des valeurs spirituelles. Pour l’homme d’aujourd’hui, la chasteté ne signifie pas abandonner le plaisir, mais choisir de vivre sa sexualité de manière réfléchie.
Vivre la chasteté au quotidien.
Les hommes qui choisissent la chasteté peuvent se tourner vers plusieurs méthodes. Il est important de faire une introspection pour cerner ses propres valeurs et motivations. Éviter les contenus à caractère sexuel et autres situations similaires est recommandé pour contrôler ses désirs. Un mentor ou un groupe de soutien partageant les mêmes valeurs peut être crucial pour rester engagé. Dans une société saturée par la sexualité, pratiquer la chasteté peut présenter des difficultés. Les obstacles incluent la pression sociale et les tentations récurrentes. Une discipline personnelle rigoureuse est essentielle pour dépasser ces obstacles. En cas de difficulté, il est important de garder le moral et de recommencer avec une volonté renouvelée. La chasteté n’est pas une fin en soi mais un parcours nécessitant patience et persévérance. La chasteté, quand elle est adoptée dans la vie quotidienne, peut offrir une liberté supérieure, une maîtrise de soi améliorée, et un enrichissement spirituel profond. La chasteté, malgré son aspect parfois contraignant dans une culture qui privilégie la sexualité, permet de vivre une vie plus authentique, en accord avec ses valeurs et sa foi.
FAQ sur la Chasteté : Réponses aux Questions Fréquemment Posées.
Est-ce que la chasteté est réservée aux religieux uniquement ? La chasteté n’est pas limitée aux personnes religieuses ou consacrées. La chasteté est-elle différente de l’abstinence, et comment ? L’abstinence implique un engagement explicite à éviter les relations sexuelles. À la différence de l’abstinence, la chasteté peut nécessiter le port d’un accessoire spécifique et une démarche de développement personnel. Quelles sont les pratiques de chasteté dans le cadre du mariage ? La chasteté dans le mariage est souvent une démarche commune ; si l’un des partenaires adopte une pratique de chasteté, cela est généralement abordé avec le conjoint. Pourquoi l’Église fait-elle si grand cas de la chasteté ? La chasteté est hautement valorisée par l’Église comme étant essentielle pour vivre selon les principes chrétiens. Comment la chasteté peut-elle contribuer à l’épanouissement personnel ? En adoptant la chasteté, on peut atteindre un meilleur contrôle de soi, une plus grande clarté mentale et une paix intérieure.
La chasteté : Une vertu à reconsidérer pour l’homme moderne.
La chasteté est une vertu qui semble taboue dans notre monde actuel. Pour ceux qui l’appliquent, la chasteté propose une voie vers une paix intérieure renforcée, des relations plus profondes et une connexion spirituelle enrichissante. La chasteté, jadis, était plus fréquemment acceptée et abordée. www.chastete.fr développe de manière exhaustive la thématique de la chasteté . Cet article propose une exploration approfondie de la chasteté et donne aux hommes les moyens de comprendre et de pratiquer cette vertu dans leur vie quotidienne.
Découvrir les fondements historiques et culturels de la chasteté.
Les racines de la chasteté sont profondes dans de nombreuses traditions religieuses et culturelles. En christianisme, la chasteté est souvent liée au vœu de continence fait par les prêtres et les religieux. Dans l’islam et au sein des Églises catholique et orthodoxe, la chasteté est valorisée comme une vertu essentielle pour les religieux et les laïcs, en particulier avant le mariage. En Antiquité, la chasteté était considérée comme essentielle pour conserver l’intégrité personnelle et la pureté morale. Ainsi, la chasteté dépasse les frontières temporelles et culturelles, restant une vertu appréciée et respectée.
La relation entre chasteté et spiritualité est fondamentale.
La relation entre chasteté et spiritualité est souvent très étroite. Pour le christianisme, la chasteté est un moyen de se rapprocher de la divinité. La maîtrise des désirs sexuels permet de canaliser plus d’énergie vers le bien-être intérieur. La pratique de la chasteté est perçue comme une offrande de soi et un geste de respect divin. La chasteté est perçue non pas comme une privation, mais comme un choix visant à élever l’âme. Chaque tradition religieuse propose une vision distincte de la chasteté. Pour les prêtres catholiques, la chasteté est une vertu centrale. Dans l’islam, des règles sévères encadrent la sexualité pour promouvoir la chasteté. Dans l’hindouisme et le bouddhisme, la chasteté est souvent utilisée par les ascètes pour atteindre un état d’illumination. La chasteté réunit les croyants à travers diverses religions dans une recherche commune.
Vous pouvez visionner cette vidéo directement sur YouTube en suivant ce lien :
la publication originale: Cliquer ici
#Chastity #Day
Retranscription des paroles de la vidéo: yeah hello hey guys my name is mark gomez i’m 25 going on 26 and i am i’m involved in politics i do a little bit of this a little bit of that i work in campaigns i work in government outreach i work in community relations and that’s pretty much what i uh what i do and and it really just uh it’s a it’s a beautiful life i am ali i’m 25. you guys know me because i’m mrs martinez’s daughter um i’m a pre-k 3 teacher at st brendan and yeah mark and i have been dating for a year and a half we actually started dating right before the pandemic so we’re a pandemic relationship and it hasn’t been the easiest but it sure was a fun ride yeah so so yeah we’ve been dating for about a year and a half now but we’ve also been friends for about eight so guys there’s hope you can get out of the friendzone i promise you have to work really really hard to get out of the friend zone and girls don’t let it don’t let them don’t make it easy for them to get out of the friendzone make it a little make it a little hard for them i think if it wasn’t for the fact that we were friends before would be a little bit more difficult uh to be um to start going out and start dating but it’s really been a blessing um our relationship and we just want to share a little bit with you uh with you about our relationship and where we are now and and where we see ourselves in the future so one of the uh one of the biggest blessings in our life has been really that we were founded in in the same way right our parents raised us in the same way um we were raised with the faith being part of our uh part of our uh probably the main part of our foundation and really just growing together in that faith we met each other at a youth group at the youth movement and i think that that that getting to know each other in such a such a faithful way in a way that we were really focused on christ and and the love of god inside this relationship i think that that’s what really has focused our uh growing together uh as a couple for the future right and and really just um when you have an example of love like jesus christ it becomes a lot easier to show that love for for in this case from me to ellie so being raised in the faith and using acquaintances when he lives as a tool to really grow grow closer to each other and get to know each other we really um at first we weren’t best friends but we did grow into that uh into that aspect of friendship where i didn’t even have to tell her things that she knew what i was thinking the same she didn’t have to tell me things and i knew what she was thinking and i think that that aspect of a relationship is probably the most important and it goes down to communication right communication has to be the most important part of any relationship and and you can’t really love somebody if you don’t know them fully and the way that you get to know somebody is through communication that travels all the way from our faith to our personal lives so communication has to be one of the most important aspects of any relationship right and it’s it’s all types of relationship it could be in our faith it could be in our personal life it could be in our intimate relationships and one of the most important parts about communication is that we get to understand a little bit more about what the other person is thinking so let’s take it to the example of your classroom right now your teacher asks you to do it to do an assignment and she’s going to communicate with you the best way to do it the way that you’re going to get the best grade and how efficient how most efficiently to do it now you guys can communicate to your teacher say hey i don’t understand this i don’t understand that and then like that you guys are gonna be able to make the best out of that assignment it’s the same thing in a relationship if i’m uncomfortable with something that ellie does i have to tell her if she’s uncomfortable with something that i do she has to tell me and it’s not very easy to get something out of her because you can see that she likes to talk a lot but at the end of the day we always do communicate with each other we understand each other we understand where we’re going and that’s the important part that we have to understand where we are going and together that’s the biggest that’s the biggest reward is when we understand that we have the same goal the same end goal my goal in this relationship is god willing one day to marry ellie and to hope hopefully one day that i don’t have to worry about it but when she dies she goes straight to heaven and the same thing goes from her to me and that’s the most important part of any relationship is that we have to understand each other what each other’s needs are what each other’s wants are and how we’re going to best make it that ellie gets to heaven and i get in that in turn also to heaven and that’s our that’s the biggest point of a relationship right that we have to grow in each other for each other you want to add something and as you get closer to being in like to each other in the relationship the communication becomes a lot easier at first it’s not going to be that easy and it’s going to be super hard to tell them that oh i don’t like this i know i don’t like and i like when you do this but i don’t like it when you do that and as your relationship grows the communication will be a lot easier and you’ll be it’s not you’re telling them that you don’t like something it’s not going to hurt their feelings type of thing okay as you guys grow together your communication skills will get a lot better and hurting each other’s feelings when you want to say what you really feel it’s not going to be such a big problem now being rude it’s not the way to go but to have your feelings and being like openhearted about it the or your significant other should be able to like say okay well at least they’re telling me so you know what i’m going to change but if they don’t change then that person really isn’t listening to you so it’s all the give and take right so a relationship uh my the best advice my parents ever gave me going into a relationship is that um it’s it’s 300 percent that we’re working with right so we have a 100 from me 100 from alien 100 from god the one that that’s never going to fail is the one from god right but we always have to catch ourselves and say i i can ellie being my best friend i can tell her it’s like hey i think that we might have to work on this i have to work on this maybe you might want to work on something else and we can have that open conversation because we got to that point where we are now best friends and i think that um i think that’s one of the most important parts is that we’re growing together not only to be each other’s spouses but to be each other’s best friends it goes to the point where right now name your best friend and that’s the person that you go to for everything uh so at some point in my life my best friend was uh was one of my was one of my closest guy friends and i would go to him with for everything i would i would reach out to him whenever i had a problem i would reach out to him whenever i had a temptation i would reach out to him whenever i knew that i had to get grounded now that’s shifted because my life is gonna be forever with god willing with ellie so when when that happens i know that i can go to her with whatever with whatever problem i have and then that’s that’s that’s the beautiful part about growing a relationship going on a friendship with somebody and hopefully it for being forever um going with the best friend thing uh yours your boyfriend or your girlfriend shouldn’t be your only best friend so when when i say mark is my best friend yeah he’s my best friend and i’ll go to him for everything but you could also have your girl best friend that there are some things that he might not understand but you go to her and she understands it better and then you can go to him after after they reason with you just like boys go to their guy friends if they’re having a problem that i might not go through because i’m not a boy so having your boyfriend or girlfriend as your only friend isn’t what we’re trying to tell you and like be your only best friend mark is my best friend but i have other girl best friends so it’s healthy it’s healthy to have relationships uh friendships outside of of your intimate relationship right it’s healthy to have that time ellie knows i i have a group of guy friends so we go have guys nights every once in a while does it make her uncomfortable sometimes yeah because i go out and we go out to a bar we have a few drinks and stuff like that but it’s healthy for me to it’s really just a to really just get my mind in a different situation so when i come back it’s a fresh mind that i have uh coming back into the uh coming back into my my my day or my relationship my conversation with other uh so that’s healthy it really is and then it’s also healthy to really incorporate um your lives together right it’s not just it’s not just my life is separate and ellie’s life is separate rather we really come together it’s really healthy for that to happen so like that ellie knows what what i’m going through i know what ellie is going through and she can have an issue with her friends and i know who she’s talking about i know i know what it is and you know it’s just again it goes down to the communication really being open with each other you have to be an open book there’s no hiding anything and i think the part it’s not that i don’t like when he goes out obviously i think in a normal relationship you just want to hang out with that person all the time but it’s also being friends with his friends and him being friends with like your friends um that’s a big thing if one of you if your boyfriend or your girlfriend doesn’t like one of your friends like that should tell you something because the other person might have like an intuition like oh hey you don’t act like that when i’m around just us too but then you start acting weird about that so i think it’s being friends with his friends and being friends with her friends but that would work out so when we do all hang out it’s not like weird and awkward and always remember that communication is two ways it’s it’s speaking and listening so that’s uh that’s always uh that’s always a plus to understand and really focus on your listening skills also because i have a problem with that and she hates it but i have a real big problem with that where when she vents to me and she has issues i i like to interject my point and i i mean i love to talk so i like to give her my suggestions i like to give her and and i don’t think that they’re always invalid but there are some times where she just wants to vent and guys food for thought let your girl vent okay so let her let her get it off her chest and trust me you guys will have plenty of things to talk about uh after that and again that grows with um each other so in the beginning he he does he wouldn’t know that i don’t like when he introduced or gives me suggestions when i’m just angry but now he’s learning slowly but he’s learning that i don’t like that and i just need to vent sometimes so part of communication is getting to know each other at a really intimate level and whenever we hear the word intimacy we automatically think about sex intimacy is not so much as it is sex as it is getting to know each other on a very profound level remember that we have an intimate relationship even with jesus christ because we get to know him so much so that he penetrates our bodies through the eucharist so when we talk about intimacy in a relationship it isn’t so much sex rather it’s i know that i want to give myself fully to ellie so i have to lay everything out on the table and ellie has to do the same for me and it’s that give and take that really becomes creates an intimate relationship so remember key word there intimacy is not equal to sex but it is through that through that intimacy where we do get to that that next where we do get to that next level and i think that communication and understanding is really important when we talk about sex and chastity um we we live a life understanding full well that the church teaches us that in order for us to be happiest and in order for us to give ourselves fully to each other we have to wait until marriage and we are doing that and i’m not ashamed to say it i’m not ashamed to go around and be in a friend group i went to the university of miami and i rushed a fraternity and the first thing that they asked us is what’s your favorite sex position and i said none i’ve never done it and i don’t plan on doing it until i get married and i got ridiculed left and right but i’m i’m happy with it i’m happy with that so when when we talk about our lives when we talk about our lives together in a relationship uh there’s puzzle pieces right that go together uh and the first one is you start dating then the next one is that you uh or you start talking then you start dating then you start making everything serious and then you guys get engaged and you get married and then you have you you uh then you go to the next step which is you have sex to have kids and then so far and so forth that’s how that’s how the puzzle piece goes but if i decide to take a puzzle piece from over here and move it to the middle somewhere where it’s not supposed to go and i try to pound it in there and i take it out what happens to that puzzle piece the cardboard gets all messed up the the flaps get get uh get like bent over and it never it’s never gonna fit in the area that it fits again and that’s the important part of going with the timeline right so when when we when we finally make that decision to get married and we are we are at uh at our marriage and we we vow to each other that we are going to be open to the to the gift of children that god is sending us it’s then where we are able to fully go and and and and enjoy the marriage bed of of sex we don’t do that as of right now because we know every action uh i think it’s murphy’s law every action has an equal and opposite reaction right so every action has a consequence whether good or bad uh and i’m not saying a child is a bad consequence at all in the slightest but i’m saying that if right now ellie and i are sexually active and we go to have a kid and we’re not living together we don’t have our finances set we don’t have the blessing of our parents all of these things are in line what happens what’s the temptation at that moment that temptation is either get rid of the baby try to figure something else out we don’t know what the temptation is and we don’t even want to think about that temptation just because it’s so bad now when we go everything in order those things aren’t even relevant in the conversation we’re doing everything in order we’re going in the correct way and we know for a fact that we’re gonna we’re gonna really just please please ourselves please our lord and and really just make sure that we’re not uh we’re not just doing anything for us it’s a really selfish thing when i say that i want to have sex and oh i love you so much and if you love me back you’re going to have sex with me that’s a very selfish thing for me to say as a man and men gentlemen and and ellie will speak to the women just now but gentlemen your love will be shown more if you wait than if you just do it right now because all of your friends are doing it i promise you that the love that you guys share together it’s gonna be much stronger if you wait and you’re looking forward to something then if i just got got away with it right now and all of a sudden i got tired of my used car okay it’s a big problem when we take things out of context and out of our out of their order it becomes a very big problem so gentlemen it is cool i promise you it’s cool to wait there’s plenty of us out there that have uh that have really waited and have really focused on each other rather than rather than than my my sexual desires and my sexual needs girls so i am a virgin and i’m saving myself for mark um it’s very awkward to talk about because my mom is your teacher but she knows i had to just throw that in there um yeah so i’m saving myself from work and just like you guys are gonna have opportunities that present yourself to have sex like would you i don’t know if my mom is gonna do the rose but if you had a rose and i passed around the rose and you were able to touch it and pull the petals apart and all that and you got that rose back would you give that rose to someone else like here here’s a flower like i like i love you but here’s the flower no right you want to give them a new flower so if you decide to have sex with your boyfriend that you’ve been dating for let’s say a month you have sex and then all of a sudden every time you hang out you guys are just going to want to have sex so you got you’re at his house waiting for for him to get ready so you guys can go on a date your temptation to have sex is so much bigger um every time you guys have a nice date you he’s expecting sex after and all that like mark and i we don’t and we said it on valentine’s day mark did this huge thing for valentine’s day for me and the first thing i said to him was like i’m so happy that we didn’t have we haven’t had sex because then the relationship would be just about sex yeah so it’s just okay so at the end of the day he did something super nice to me i have to give him something for it and that’s not how our relationship is at all he does something so nice for me and i think that i show him enough of how thankful i am for him that it’s enough that i don’t have to have sex with him which is essentially what you guys want to do you guys want to make the person you’re with super happy and happy enough that you don’t have to give them something that you’re not ready to give him and if i may speak to the ladies for just one moment they’ll be just one sentence for you guys if the guy tells you i’m i love you so much if you love me you would have sex with me leave leave call your parents call your friend call somebody to pick you up from wherever you are that’s going to be extremely toxic number one make sure you’re very cautious and understand that love does not mean sex love real love real love and and i guess we can we can start wrapping it up with this real love is when my happiness comes from her smile that’s what real love is it doesn’t matter that we’re having sex it doesn’t matter that we’re not having sex it doesn’t matter that we do this it doesn’t matter that we go out it doesn’t matter any of that stuff the moment that i can say i my happiness comes from her being happy that’s where the love is that’s what real real love is it does not matter about the sex so if they ever tell you guys to girls girls to guys if they ever say oh you’ll do it if you love me yes don’t fall into that trap so part of communication and um ellie ellie we’ll we’ll go a little bit deeper into this the part of communication and that intimate communication that we were talking about is really just to uh just to focus on setting ground rules right and i think that you want to take this away so when mark and i started dating it was pretty it went a little slow in the beginning just because we are growing from a friendship into a relationship which is probably one of the hardest things that you have to do because now you’re moving to another level excuse me i got out of the friend zone guys so there’s hope barely he barely got out of the friendzone um one of the first things that we did talk about like before anything was that we’re gonna have like rules so i was pretty set and he was pretty said i’m not having sex before marriage and i’m pretty sure we’re pretty confident that we’re gonna get married um again we were friends for seven years i am dating for a year and a half i don’t think we’re gonna go anywhere um but we set ground rules of what we wanted in our relationship so the biggest thing was not having sex because again i didn’t want to hang out with him just to have sex especially with our relationship we started right before corona and then yeah and he had his job which we would we wouldn’t it’s not that we didn’t see each other but we would see each other for a short amount of time and if we had started having sex before that was the only thing that we would like look forward to and i’m so happy that we didn’t because our hanging out was simply hanging out and to be honest our hanging out was taking a nap all the time on the sofa watching tv watching tv watching a movie watching something but it goes back to the to that that word temptation that i used earlier um if we put ourselves in positions that are really going to tempt us we are humans we’re going to fall which is why we make it a point to not let ourselves get into those into those into those situations where we can fall into temptation if we’re at home and we find ourselves at home alone we’re walking out and we’re gonna go do something we’re gonna go be active we’re gonna go to the park we’re gonna go on a picnic we’re gonna go to dinner in a public space but we’re not gonna let ourselves be home alone where we know for a fact it’s like if we stay here just another 50 minutes another 15 minutes guys there’s no difference between us our tendencies and yours and miss martinez’s and her husband there’s no difference in our tendencies we we are we are sexual human beings it happens it’s it’s part of our procreation it’s what we’re what we’re called to do as married men and women of and children of god we have to keep this this life going and the only way that we can keep that going is by having sex and having kids so if if we are we are we are called to that we are called to that beautiful intimate action of of having sex to procreate um so we have that temptation all the time i i i yes i want to have sex one day with ellie and i’m sure that ellie wants to have sex with me one day it’s it’s an actual real conversation that we have to have but right now we we can’t do that because like ellie was saying and i think she hit it perfectly on the she hit the nail perfectly on the head is that if we have sex now it’s gonna our relationship is gonna change 100 from this thing that we’re getting to know each other and we’re going to love each other and we we’re getting to that point where we want to take the next step in our relationship it will change from that to hey when are we going to do it next and then that’s where it becomes really dangerous vacation will never be easy to talk about this because even dating for a year and a half it’s still awkward to have a conversation but if you don’t have it just because it’s awkward then you’re gonna fall into the guy saying oh let’s have sex and guys that goes for you too because the girl could be like she might not be guys they want it just as much as we do okay so it’s very simple but this girl might be leading you into something that you’re not comfortable doing yet that you’re not ready or you know that you don’t want to marry this girl especially when you’re in high school like you guys aren’t ready to get married yet so so why in in summary um i think that it’s safe to say that we can start wrapping up now um number one it’s courageous to wait it really is um and again we know we know for a fact that we are called to uh to a life of courage um we might be getting ready to move on into our into our next step into going into high school we might be getting ready to go into uh the sacrament of confirmation um and in this in this time in this place right now you’re being invited whether it be by us or just by the grace of god um and him speaking through us you’re being invited to to take that extra step um if god forbid you’ve already taken that step and you’ve already taken that action it’s okay there are things called the second virginity it’s happened before where people where people fall into the temptation get back up get back on your feet our god is an all-merciful god get back on your feet and say as of this moment as of this day i’m not gonna do that again i’m not gonna fall into that that trap again into that trap of lust into that trap of temptation it’s okay to do that it’s courageous it’s it’s it’s a good thing and trust me um if if waiting wasn’t a good thing it wouldn’t be so prominent in our faith uh and it’s not a it’s not a you can’t have sex before marriage it’s a it’s a wait because it’ll be more fruitful that’s what it is the rule is not about it’s not about it being a bad thing because if it would be a bad thing we would never do it and we there would not be no kids the the rule is wait because it’ll be more fruitful and you don’t have to worry about anything and then one last thing if you do know someone who’s had sex it’s not right to judge them because just because they had sex and they did something wrong you’re doing something just as bad because you’re judging them for doing that so we’re not saying like oh if you had sex like you’re gonna you’re going to hell no of course not again like mark was saying god loves everybody and he forgives everybody and if you truly are sorry for what you did and you said you’re not gonna do it again then it’s not a problem but if you go out and your friend had sex and you’re like wow you’re going to hell then that’s just as bad as having sex we have to show compassion and love and in that compassion and love we gotta invite people so they can really see what it is that we see um it’s a beautiful life this life i i’m sure i’d speak for ellie this life of waiting this life of growing together in that in that intimate conversation that does not include sex um it’s it’s really a beautiful and fruitful life yes there are plenty of temptations there are plenty of opportunities for us to do things uh but luckily uh through the grace of god we’ve been able to uh we’ve been able to really just focus on each other um and really just help each other out help help each other grow in holiness remember we’re called to holiness so let’s let’s make it there we can make it there together and i think that um that i’ll leave you guys with this our relationship is not perfect there are plenty of things we argue we fight we we do get into arguments it’s not always going to be a what’s uh i don’t know what the yeah it’s not it’s not always going to be rainbows and butterflies um but that that’s the beauty that’s the beauty of two people coming together two different people coming together to create one life that’s the beauty of it uh where we can be different people and just grow together um and and i i i’ll tell you guys the way that we can do this maintain a life of prayer maintain an open line of communication and don’t stop going to mass go to mass together i highly recommend it ellie and i go to match together by ourselves we don’t have to go with our parents we don’t have to go with our friends with our brothers with our sisters we don’t have to go do that we go by ourselves and we grow together just like that and our conversations to and from are always different on our way too we might be talking about one thing on the way back we might be talking about the homily and how father how father was great this weekend or whatever it might be but maintain that line of communication maintain the life of prayer and maintain a life of of being present in the eucharist in the holy mass and i promise you it’ll be easy it’ll be fruitful and it’ll be worth it thank you guys so much uh we really had fun doing this uh it took us a lot longer what you guys are seeing is a really edited version we’ll add some bloopers at the end of this but thank you guys so much for listening um it was really fun uh to really just re revitalize that relationship that we had that we have promised each other um and to really go back to what we were thinking about in those ground rules and stuff like that so thank you guys for this opportunity to share with you again my name is mark gomez hi i’m ali this was very awkward to make all right if you guys have any questions about anything just let my mom know and we’ll try to answer them as soon as possible we could do a follow-up video we don’t have a problem with that so if you guys have any questions just jot them down give them to ms martinez and we can we can go ahead and do this again you .
Déroulement de la vidéo:
8.48 yeah hello
8.48 hey guys my name is mark gomez i&;m 25
8.48 going on 26
8.48 and i am i&;m involved in politics i do a
8.48 little bit of this a little bit of that
8.48 i work in campaigns i work in government
8.48 outreach i work in community relations
8.48 and that&;s pretty much what i uh what i
8.48 do and and it really just uh
8.48 it&;s a it&;s a beautiful life i am ali
8.48 i&;m 25. you guys know me because i&;m mrs
8.48 martinez&;s daughter
8.48 um i&;m a pre-k 3 teacher at st brendan
8.48 and yeah mark and i have been dating for
8.48 a year and a half
8.48 we actually started dating right before
8.48 the pandemic so we&;re a pandemic
8.48 relationship
8.48 and it hasn&;t been the easiest but it
8.48 sure was a fun ride
8.48 yeah so so yeah we&;ve been dating for
8.48 about a year and a half now but we&;ve
8.48 also been friends for about eight
8.48 so guys there&;s hope you can get out of
8.48 the friendzone i promise
8.48 you have to work really really hard to
8.48 get out of the friend zone
8.48 and girls don&;t let it don&;t let them
8.48 don&;t make it easy for them to get out
8.48 of the friendzone make it a little
8.48 make it a little hard for them i think
8.48 if it wasn&;t for the fact that we were
8.48 friends before would be a little bit
8.48 more difficult
8.48 uh to be um to start going out and start
8.48 dating but
8.48 it&;s really been a blessing um our
8.48 relationship and we just want to share a
8.48 little bit with you uh with you about
8.48 our relationship and where we are now
8.48 and
8.48 and where we see ourselves in the future
8.48 so one of the uh one of the biggest
8.48 blessings in our life has been
8.48 really that we were founded in in the
8.48 same way right our parents raised us in
8.48 the same way
8.48 um we were raised with the faith being
8.48 part of our uh
8.48 part of our uh probably the main part of
8.48 our foundation
8.48 and really just growing together in that
8.48 faith we met each other at a youth group
8.48 at the youth movement and i think that
8.48 that
8.48 that getting to know each other in such
8.48 a such a faithful way
8.48 in a way that we were really focused on
8.48 christ and and the love of god
8.48 inside this relationship i think that
8.48 that&;s what really has focused
8.48 our uh growing together uh as a couple
8.48 for the future right and and really just
8.48 um when you have an example of love like
8.48 jesus christ it becomes a lot easier to
8.48 show that love for
8.48 for in this case from me to ellie
8.48 so being raised in the faith and using
8.48 acquaintances when he lives as a tool to
8.48 really grow
8.48 grow closer to each other and get to
8.48 know each other we really
8.48 um at first we weren&;t best friends but
8.48 we did grow into that uh into that
8.48 aspect of friendship
8.48 where i didn&;t even have to tell her
8.48 things that she knew what i was thinking
8.48 the same
8.48 she didn&;t have to tell me things and i
8.48 knew what she was thinking and i think
8.48 that that aspect of a relationship is
8.48 probably the most important
8.48 and it goes down to communication right
8.48 communication has to be the most
8.48 important part of any relationship
8.48 and and you can&;t really love somebody
8.48 if you don&;t know them fully and the way
8.48 that you get to know somebody is through
8.48 communication
8.48 that travels all the way from our faith
8.48 to our personal lives
8.48 so communication has to be one of the
8.48 most important aspects of any
8.48 relationship right
8.48 and it&;s it&;s all types of relationship
8.48 it could be in our faith it could be in
8.48 our personal life it could be in our
8.48 intimate relationships and one of the
8.48 most important parts about communication
8.48 is that we get to understand a little
8.48 bit more about what the other person is
8.48 thinking
8.48 so let&;s take it to the example of your
8.48 classroom right now your teacher asks
8.48 you to do it
8.48 to do an assignment and she&;s going to
8.48 communicate with you the best way to do
8.48 it the way that you&;re going to get the
8.48 best grade
8.48 and how efficient how most efficiently
8.48 to do it now you guys can communicate to
8.48 your teacher say hey i don&;t understand
8.48 this i don&;t understand that and then
8.48 like that you guys are gonna be able to
8.48 make
8.48 the best out of that assignment it&;s the
8.48 same thing in a relationship
8.48 if i&;m uncomfortable with something that
8.48 ellie does i have to tell her
8.48 if she&;s uncomfortable with something
8.48 that i do she has to tell me and it&;s
8.48 not very easy
8.48 to get something out of her because you
8.48 can see that she likes to talk a lot
8.48 but at the end of the day we always do
8.48 communicate with each other we
8.48 understand each other we understand
8.48 where we&;re going
8.48 and that&;s the important part that we
8.48 have to understand where we are going
8.48 and together that&;s the biggest that&;s
8.48 the biggest
8.48 reward is when we understand that we
8.48 have the same
8.48 goal the same end goal my goal in this
8.48 relationship
8.48 is god willing one day to marry ellie
8.48 and to hope hopefully one day
8.48 that i don&;t have to worry about it but
8.48 when she dies she goes straight to
8.48 heaven
8.48 and the same thing goes from her to me
8.48 and that&;s the most important part of
8.48 any relationship is that we have to
8.48 understand
8.48 each other what each other&;s needs are
8.48 what each other&;s wants are
8.48 and how we&;re going to best make it that
8.48 ellie gets to heaven
8.48 and i get in that in turn also to heaven
8.48 and that&;s our that&;s the biggest point
8.48 of a relationship right that we have to
8.48 grow in each other
8.48 for each other you want to add something
8.48 and as you get closer to being in like
8.48 to each other in the relationship the
8.48 communication becomes a lot easier
8.48 at first it&;s not going to be that easy
8.48 and it&;s going to be super hard to tell
8.48 them that oh i don&;t like this i know i
8.48 don&;t like and i like when you do this
8.48 but i don&;t like it when you do that
8.48 and as your relationship grows the
8.48 communication will be a lot easier and
8.48 you&;ll be
8.48 it&;s not you&;re telling them that you
8.48 don&;t like something it&;s not going to
8.48 hurt their feelings
8.48 type of thing okay as you guys grow
8.48 together
8.48 your communication skills will get a lot
8.48 better
8.48 and hurting each other&;s feelings when
8.48 you want to say what you really feel
8.48 it&;s not going to be such a big problem
8.48 now being rude it&;s not
8.48 the way to go but to have your
8.48 feelings and being like openhearted
8.48 about it the or your significant other
8.48 should be able to
8.48 like say okay well at least they&;re
8.48 telling me so you know what i&;m going to
8.48 change but if they don&;t change then
8.48 that person really isn&;t listening to
8.48 you
8.48 so it&;s all the give and take right so a
8.48 relationship uh my the best advice my
8.48 parents ever gave me
8.48 going into a relationship is that um
8.48 it&;s it&;s 300 percent that we&;re working
8.48 with right
8.48 so we have a 100 from me 100 from alien
8.48 100 from god the one that
8.48 that&;s never going to fail is the one
8.48 from god right but we always have to
8.48 catch ourselves
8.48 and say i i can ellie being my best
8.48 friend i can
8.48 tell her it&;s like hey i think that we
8.48 might have to work on this
8.48 i have to work on this maybe you might
8.48 want to work on something else
8.48 and we can have that open conversation
8.48 because we got to that point where we
8.48 are now best friends and i think that
8.48 um i think that&;s one of the most
8.48 important parts is that we&;re growing
8.48 together
8.48 not only to be each other&;s spouses but
8.48 to be each other&;s best friends
8.48 it goes to the point where right now
8.48 name your best friend and that&;s the
8.48 person that you go to for everything
8.48 uh so at some point in my life my best
8.48 friend
8.48 was uh was one of my was one of my
8.48 closest guy friends
8.48 and i would go to him with for
8.48 everything i would i would reach out to
8.48 him whenever i had a problem i would
8.48 reach out to him whenever
8.48 i had a temptation i would reach out to
8.48 him whenever i knew that i had to get
8.48 grounded
8.48 now that&;s shifted because my life is
8.48 gonna be forever with
8.48 god willing with ellie so when when that
8.48 happens i know that i can go to her with
8.48 whatever with whatever problem i have
8.48 and then that&;s that&;s that&;s the
8.48 beautiful part about growing a
8.48 relationship going on a friendship
8.48 with somebody and hopefully it for being
8.48 forever um going with the best friend
8.48 thing uh yours your boyfriend or your
8.48 girlfriend shouldn&;t be
8.48 your only best friend so when when i say
8.48 mark is my best friend yeah he&;s my best
8.48 friend and i&;ll go to him
8.48 for everything but you could also have
8.48 your girl best friend that there are
8.48 some things that
8.48 he might not understand but you go to
8.48 her and she understands it better
8.48 and then you can go to him after after
8.48 they reason with you just like boys go
8.48 to their guy friends if they&;re having a
8.48 problem that i might not go
8.48 through because i&;m not a boy so having
8.48 your boyfriend or girlfriend
8.48 as your only friend isn&;t what we&;re
8.48 trying to tell you and like
8.48 be your only best friend mark is my best
8.48 friend but i have
8.48 other girl best friends so it&;s healthy
8.48 it&;s healthy to have relationships
8.48 uh friendships outside of of your
8.48 intimate relationship right it&;s healthy
8.48 to have that time
8.48 ellie knows i i have a group of guy
8.48 friends so we go have guys nights
8.48 every once in a while does it make her
8.48 uncomfortable sometimes yeah because i
8.48 go out and we go out to a bar we have a
8.48 few drinks and stuff like that but
8.48 it&;s healthy for me to it&;s really just
8.48 a
8.48 to really just get my mind in a
8.48 different situation so when i come back
8.48 it&;s a fresh mind that i have
8.48 uh coming back into the uh coming back
8.48 into my my my day or my relationship my
8.48 conversation with other
8.48 uh so that&;s healthy it really is and
8.48 then it&;s also healthy
8.48 to really incorporate um your lives
8.48 together right it&;s not just
8.48 it&;s not just my life is separate and
8.48 ellie&;s life is separate
8.48 rather we really come together it&;s
8.48 really healthy for that to happen so
8.48 like that
8.48 ellie knows what what i&;m going through
8.48 i know what ellie is going through
8.48 and she can have an issue with her
8.48 friends and i know who she&;s talking
8.48 about
8.48 i know i know what it is and you know
8.48 it&;s just again it goes down to the
8.48 communication
8.48 really being open with each other you
8.48 have to be an open book there&;s no
8.48 hiding anything
8.48 and i think the part it&;s not that i
8.48 don&;t like when he goes out obviously
8.48 i think in a normal relationship you
8.48 just want to hang out with that person
8.48 all the time
8.48 but it&;s also being friends with his
8.48 friends and him being friends with like
8.48 your friends
8.48 um that&;s a big thing if one of you if
8.48 your boyfriend or your girlfriend
8.48 doesn&;t like
8.48 one of your friends like that should
8.48 tell you something because
8.48 the other person might have like an
8.48 intuition like oh hey you
8.48 don&;t act like that when i&;m around just
8.48 us too but then you start acting weird
8.48 about that so i think it&;s being friends
8.48 with his friends and being friends with
8.48 her friends
8.48 but that would work out so when we do
8.48 all hang out it&;s not like weird
8.48 and awkward and always remember that
8.48 communication is two ways it&;s
8.48 it&;s speaking and listening so that&;s uh
8.48 that&;s always uh that&;s always a plus to
8.48 understand and really focus on your
8.48 listening skills also
8.48 because i have a problem with that and
8.48 she hates it but i have a real big
8.48 problem with that where
8.48 when she vents to me and she has issues
8.48 i i like to interject my point and i i
8.48 mean i love to talk so
8.48 i like to give her my suggestions i like
8.48 to give her and and i don&;t think that
8.48 they&;re always invalid but there are
8.48 some times where she just wants to vent
8.48 and guys food for thought let your girl
8.48 vent
8.48 okay so let her let her get it off her
8.48 chest and trust me
8.48 you guys will have plenty of things to
8.48 talk about uh after that
8.48 and again that grows with um each other
8.48 so in the beginning he he does he
8.48 wouldn&;t know that i don&;t like when
8.48 he introduced or gives me suggestions
8.48 when i&;m just angry
8.48 but now he&;s learning slowly but he&;s
8.48 learning
8.48 that i don&;t like that and i just need
8.48 to vent sometimes
8.48 so part of communication is getting to
8.48 know each other at a really
8.48 intimate level and whenever we hear the
8.48 word intimacy we automatically think
8.48 about sex
8.48 intimacy is not so much as it is sex as
8.48 it is
8.48 getting to know each other on a very
8.48 profound level remember that we have an
8.48 intimate relationship even with jesus
8.48 christ
8.48 because we get to know him so much so
8.48 that he penetrates our bodies through
8.48 the eucharist
8.48 so when we talk about intimacy in a
8.48 relationship it isn&;t so much
8.48 sex rather it&;s i know that i want to
8.48 give myself fully to ellie so i have to
8.48 lay everything out on the table and
8.48 ellie has to do the same for me
8.48 and it&;s that give and take that really
8.48 becomes
8.48 creates an intimate relationship so
8.48 remember
8.48 key word there intimacy is not equal to
8.48 sex
8.48 but it is through that
8.48 through that intimacy where we do get to
8.48 that
8.48 that next where we do get to that next
8.48 level
8.48 and i think that communication and
8.48 understanding is really important when
8.48 we talk about
8.48 sex and chastity um we we live a life
8.48 understanding full well that the church
8.48 teaches us
8.48 that in order for us to be happiest and
8.48 in order for us to give ourselves fully
8.48 to each other
8.48 we have to wait until marriage and we
8.48 are doing that
8.48 and i&;m not ashamed to say it i&;m not
8.48 ashamed to go around and
8.48 be in a friend group i went to the
8.48 university of miami and i rushed a
8.48 fraternity and the first thing that they
8.48 asked us is what&;s your favorite sex
8.48 position
8.48 and i said none i&;ve never done it and i
8.48 don&;t plan on doing it until i get
8.48 married and i got ridiculed
8.48 left and right but i&;m i&;m happy with it
8.48 i&;m happy with that
8.48 so when when we talk about our lives
8.48 when we talk about our lives together
8.48 in a relationship uh there&;s puzzle
8.48 pieces right that go together
8.48 uh and the first one is you start dating
8.48 then the next one is that you uh
8.48 or you start talking then you start
8.48 dating then you start making everything
8.48 serious and then you guys get engaged
8.48 and you get married and then you have
8.48 you you uh then you go to the next step
8.48 which is you have sex to have kids and
8.48 then
8.48 so far and so forth that&;s how that&;s
8.48 how the puzzle piece goes
8.48 but if i decide to take a puzzle piece
8.48 from over here and move it to the middle
8.48 somewhere
8.48 where it&;s not supposed to go and i try
8.48 to pound it in there and i take it out
8.48 what happens to that puzzle piece the
8.48 cardboard gets all messed up
8.48 the the flaps get get uh get like bent
8.48 over and it never it&;s never gonna fit
8.48 in the area that it fits again
8.48 and that&;s the important part of going
8.48 with the timeline right so when when we
8.48 when we finally make that decision to
8.48 get married
8.48 and we are we are at uh at our marriage
8.48 and we we
8.48 vow to each other that we are going to
8.48 be open to the
8.48 to the gift of children that god is
8.48 sending us
8.48 it&;s then where we are able to fully go
8.48 and and
8.48 and and enjoy the marriage bed of of sex
8.48 we don&;t do that as of right now because
8.48 we know
8.48 every action uh i think it&;s murphy&;s
8.48 law
8.48 every action has an equal and opposite
8.48 reaction right
8.48 so every action has a consequence
8.48 whether good or bad
8.48 uh and i&;m not saying a child is a bad
8.48 consequence at all in the slightest
8.48 but i&;m saying that if right now ellie
8.48 and i are sexually active
8.48 and we go to have a kid and we&;re not
8.48 living together
8.48 we don&;t have our finances set we don&;t
8.48 have the blessing of our parents
8.48 all of these things are in line what
8.48 happens what&;s the temptation at that
8.48 moment
8.48 that temptation is either get rid of the
8.48 baby try to figure something else out
8.48 we don&;t know what the temptation is and
8.48 we don&;t even want to think about that
8.48 temptation just because it&;s so bad
8.48 now when we go everything in order those
8.48 things
8.48 aren&;t even relevant in the conversation
8.48 we&;re doing everything in order we&;re
8.48 going in the correct
8.48 way and we know for a fact that we&;re
8.48 gonna we&;re gonna really just
8.48 please please ourselves please our lord
8.48 and and really just make sure that we&;re
8.48 not
8.48 uh we&;re not just doing anything for us
8.48 it&;s a really selfish thing
8.48 when i say that i want to have sex and
8.48 oh i love you so much and
8.48 if you love me back you&;re going to have
8.48 sex with me that&;s a very selfish thing
8.48 for me to say as a man
8.48 and men gentlemen and and ellie will
8.48 speak to the women just now but
8.48 gentlemen
8.48 your love will be shown more if you wait
8.48 than if you just do it right now because
8.48 all of your friends are doing it
8.48 i promise you that the love that you
8.48 guys share together it&;s gonna be much
8.48 stronger
8.48 if you wait and you&;re looking forward
8.48 to something then if i just got
8.48 got away with it right now and all of a
8.48 sudden i got tired of my used car
8.48 okay it&;s a big problem when we take
8.48 things out of context and out of our out
8.48 of their order
8.48 it becomes a very big problem so
8.48 gentlemen
8.48 it is cool i promise you it&;s cool to
8.48 wait there&;s plenty of us out there
8.48 that have uh that have really waited and
8.48 have really focused on
8.48 each other rather than rather than
8.48 than my my sexual desires and my sexual
8.48 needs
8.48 girls so i am a virgin
8.48 and i&;m saving myself for mark um
8.48 it&;s very awkward to talk about because
8.48 my mom is your teacher
8.48 but she knows i had to just throw that
8.48 in there
8.48 um yeah so i&;m saving myself from work
8.48 and just like you guys are gonna have
8.48 opportunities that present yourself to
8.48 have sex like
8.48 would you i don&;t know if my mom is
8.48 gonna do the rose
8.48 but if you had a rose and i passed
8.48 around the rose and you were able to
8.48 touch it
8.48 and pull the petals apart and all that
8.48 and you got that rose back would you
8.48 give that rose to someone else
8.48 like here here&;s a flower like i like i
8.48 love you but here&;s the flower
8.48 no right you want to give them a new
8.48 flower so
8.48 if you decide to have sex with your
8.48 boyfriend that you&;ve been dating for
8.48 let&;s say a month you have sex and then
8.48 all of a sudden
8.48 every time you hang out you guys are
8.48 just going to want to have sex
8.48 so you got you&;re at his house waiting
8.48 for
8.48 for him to get ready so you guys can go
8.48 on a date your temptation to have sex is
8.48 so much bigger
8.48 um every time you guys have a nice date
8.48 you he&;s expecting sex after and all
8.48 that
8.48 like mark and i we don&;t and we said it
8.48 on valentine&;s day mark did this huge
8.48 thing for valentine&;s day for me and
8.48 the first thing i said to him was like
8.48 i&;m so happy that we didn&;t have
8.48 we haven&;t had sex because then the
8.48 relationship would be just about sex
8.48 yeah
8.48 so it&;s just okay so at the end of the
8.48 day he did something super nice to me i
8.48 have to give him something for it
8.48 and that&;s not how our relationship is
8.48 at all he does something so nice for me
8.48 and
8.48 i think that i show him enough of how
8.48 thankful i am for him
8.48 that it&;s enough that i don&;t have to
8.48 have sex with him which is
8.48 essentially what you guys want to do you
8.48 guys want to make the person you&;re with
8.48 super happy
8.48 and happy enough that you don&;t have to
8.48 give them something that you&;re not
8.48 ready to give him
8.48 and if i may speak to the ladies for
8.48 just one moment they&;ll be just one
8.48 sentence for you guys
8.48 if the guy tells you i&;m i love you so
8.48 much
8.48 if you love me you would have sex with
8.48 me leave leave call your parents call
8.48 your friend call somebody to pick you up
8.48 from wherever you are
8.48 that&;s going to be extremely toxic
8.48 number one make sure you&;re very
8.48 cautious and understand that
8.48 love does not mean sex love
8.48 real love real love and and i guess we
8.48 can we can start wrapping it up with
8.48 this
8.48 real love is when my happiness comes
8.48 from her smile
8.48 that&;s what real love is it doesn&;t
8.48 matter that we&;re having sex it doesn&;t
8.48 matter that we&;re not having sex it
8.48 doesn&;t matter that we do this it
8.48 doesn&;t matter that we go out it doesn&;t
8.48 matter any of that stuff
8.48 the moment that i can say i my happiness
8.48 comes from her being happy
8.48 that&;s where the love is that&;s what
8.48 real real love is
8.48 it does not matter about the sex so if
8.48 they ever tell you
8.48 guys to girls girls to guys if they ever
8.48 say oh you&;ll do it if you love me yes
8.48 don&;t fall into that trap so part of
8.48 communication and um
8.48 ellie ellie we&;ll we&;ll go a little bit
8.48 deeper into this the part of
8.48 communication
8.48 and that intimate communication that we
8.48 were talking about is really just to uh
8.48 just to focus on setting ground rules
8.48 right and i think that you want to take
8.48 this away
8.48 so when mark and i started dating it was
8.48 pretty
8.48 it went a little slow in the beginning
8.48 just because we are growing from a
8.48 friendship
8.48 into a relationship which is probably
8.48 one of the hardest things that you have
8.48 to do because
8.48 now you&;re moving to another level
8.48 excuse me i got out of the friend zone
8.48 guys so
8.48 there&;s hope barely he barely got out of
8.48 the friendzone
8.48 um one of the first things that we did
8.48 talk about like
8.48 before anything was that we&;re gonna
8.48 have like rules
8.48 so i was pretty set and he was pretty
8.48 said i&;m not having sex
8.48 before marriage and i&;m pretty sure
8.48 we&;re pretty confident that we&;re gonna
8.48 get married
8.48 um again we were friends for seven years
8.48 i am dating for a year and a half i
8.48 don&;t think we&;re gonna go anywhere
8.48 um but we set ground rules of
8.48 what we wanted in our relationship so
8.48 the biggest thing was not having sex
8.48 because again i didn&;t want to hang out
8.48 with him just to have sex
8.48 especially with our relationship we
8.48 started right before corona
8.48 and then yeah and he had his job
8.48 which we would we wouldn&;t it&;s not that
8.48 we didn&;t see each other but we would
8.48 see each other for
8.48 a short amount of time and if we had
8.48 started having sex before that was the
8.48 only thing that we would
8.48 like look forward to and i&;m so happy
8.48 that we didn&;t because
8.48 our hanging out was
8.48 simply hanging out and to be honest our
8.48 hanging out was taking a nap
8.48 all the time on the sofa watching tv
8.48 watching tv watching a movie watching
8.48 something
8.48 but it goes back to the to that that
8.48 word temptation that i used earlier
8.48 um if we put ourselves in positions that
8.48 are really going to tempt us
8.48 we are humans we&;re going to fall which
8.48 is why we make it a point
8.48 to not let ourselves get into those into
8.48 those into those situations
8.48 where we can fall into temptation if
8.48 we&;re at home and we find ourselves at
8.48 home alone
8.48 we&;re walking out and we&;re gonna go do
8.48 something we&;re gonna go be active we&;re
8.48 gonna go to the park we&;re gonna go
8.48 on a picnic we&;re gonna go to dinner in
8.48 a public space but
8.48 we&;re not gonna let ourselves be home
8.48 alone where we know for a fact it&;s like
8.48 if we stay here just another 50 minutes
8.48 another 15 minutes
8.48 guys there&;s no difference between us
8.48 our tendencies
8.48 and yours and miss martinez&;s and her
8.48 husband
8.48 there&;s no difference in our tendencies
8.48 we we are we are sexual human beings it
8.48 happens
8.48 it&;s it&;s part of our procreation it&;s
8.48 what we&;re what we&;re called to do
8.48 as married men and women of and children
8.48 of god
8.48 we have to keep this this life going and
8.48 the only way that we can keep that going
8.48 is by
8.48 having sex and having kids so if if we
8.48 are
8.48 we are we are called to that we are
8.48 called to that beautiful
8.48 intimate action of of having sex to
8.48 procreate
8.48 um so we have that temptation all the
8.48 time i i
8.48 i yes i want to have sex one day with
8.48 ellie
8.48 and i&;m sure that ellie wants to have
8.48 sex with me one day it&;s it&;s an
8.48 actual real conversation that we have to
8.48 have but
8.48 right now we we can&;t do that because
8.48 like ellie was saying and i think she
8.48 hit it perfectly on the she hit the nail
8.48 perfectly on the head
8.48 is that if we have sex now it&;s gonna
8.48 our relationship is gonna change
8.48 100 from this thing that we&;re getting
8.48 to know each other and we&;re going to
8.48 love each other and we we&;re getting to
8.48 that point where we want to take the
8.48 next step in our relationship
8.48 it will change from that to hey when are
8.48 we going to do it next
8.48 and then that&;s where it becomes really
8.48 dangerous vacation will never be easy to
8.48 talk about this because even
8.48 dating for a year and a half it&;s still
8.48 awkward to have a conversation but if
8.48 you don&;t have it just because it&;s
8.48 awkward
8.48 then you&;re gonna fall into the guy
8.48 saying oh let&;s have sex
8.48 and guys that goes for you too because
8.48 the girl could be like she might not be
8.48 guys they want it just as much as we do
8.48 okay so it&;s very simple
8.48 but this girl might be leading you into
8.48 something that you&;re not comfortable
8.48 doing yet
8.48 that you&;re not ready or you know that
8.48 you don&;t want to marry this girl
8.48 especially when you&;re in high school
8.48 like you guys aren&;t ready to get
8.48 married yet so
8.48 so why in in summary um i think that
8.48 it&;s safe to say that we can start
8.48 wrapping up now
8.48 um number one it&;s courageous to wait it
8.48 really is
8.48 um and again we know we know for a fact
8.48 that we are called to uh to a life of
8.48 courage
8.48 um we might be getting ready to move on
8.48 into our
8.48 into our next step into going into high
8.48 school we might be getting ready to go
8.48 into
8.48 uh the sacrament of confirmation um and
8.48 in this
8.48 in this time in this place right now
8.48 you&;re being invited
8.48 whether it be by us or just by the grace
8.48 of god um and him
8.48 speaking through us you&;re being invited
8.48 to to take that extra step
8.48 um if god forbid you&;ve already taken
8.48 that step and you&;ve already taken that
8.48 action
8.48 it&;s okay there are things called the
8.48 second virginity it&;s happened before
8.48 where people where people fall into the
8.48 temptation
8.48 get back up get back on your feet our
8.48 god is an all-merciful god
8.48 get back on your feet and say as of this
8.48 moment
8.48 as of this day i&;m not gonna do that
8.48 again i&;m not gonna fall into that that
8.48 trap again
8.48 into that trap of lust into that trap of
8.48 temptation
8.48 it&;s okay to do that it&;s courageous
8.48 it&;s it&;s it&;s a good
8.48 thing and trust me um if if waiting
8.48 wasn&;t a good thing
8.48 it wouldn&;t be so prominent in our faith
8.48 uh and it&;s not
8.48 a it&;s not a you can&;t have sex before
8.48 marriage it&;s a
8.48 it&;s a wait because it&;ll be more
8.48 fruitful
8.48 that&;s what it is the rule is not about
8.48 it&;s not about it being a bad thing
8.48 because if it would be a bad thing we
8.48 would never do it and we there would not
8.48 be no kids
8.48 the the rule is wait because it&;ll be
8.48 more fruitful
8.48 and you don&;t have to worry about
8.48 anything
8.48 and then one last thing if you do know
8.48 someone who&;s had sex
8.48 it&;s not right to judge them because
8.48 just because
8.48 they had sex and they did something
8.48 wrong you&;re doing something just
8.48 as bad because you&;re judging them for
8.48 doing that so
8.48 we&;re not saying like oh if you had sex
8.48 like you&;re gonna you&;re going to hell
8.48 no of course not again like mark was
8.48 saying god
8.48 loves everybody and he forgives
8.48 everybody and if you truly are sorry for
8.48 what you did and you
8.48 said you&;re not gonna do it again then
8.48 it&;s not a problem but
8.48 if you go out and your friend had sex
8.48 and you&;re like wow you&;re going to hell
8.48 then that&;s just as bad as having sex
8.48 we have to show compassion and love and
8.48 in that compassion and love we gotta
8.48 invite people so they can
8.48 really see what it is that we see um
8.48 it&;s a beautiful life this life i i&;m
8.48 sure i&;d speak for ellie this life of
8.48 waiting this life of growing
8.48 together in that in that intimate
8.48 conversation that does not include sex
8.48 um it&;s it&;s really a beautiful and
8.48 fruitful life
8.48 yes there are plenty of temptations
8.48 there are plenty of opportunities for us
8.48 to do things
8.48 uh but luckily uh through the grace of
8.48 god we&;ve been able to uh
8.48 we&;ve been able to really just focus on
8.48 each other um
8.48 and really just help each other out help
8.48 help each other grow in holiness
8.48 remember we&;re called to holiness so
8.48 let&;s let&;s make it there we can make it
8.48 there together
8.48 and i think that um that i&;ll leave you
8.48 guys with this our relationship is not
8.48 perfect
8.48 there are plenty of things we argue we
8.48 fight we we do get into arguments
8.48 it&;s not always going to be a what&;s uh
8.48 i don&;t know what the
8.48 yeah it&;s not it&;s not always going to
8.48 be rainbows and butterflies um
8.48 but that that&;s the beauty that&;s the
8.48 beauty of two people coming together
8.48 two different people coming together to
8.48 create one life
8.48 that&;s the beauty of it uh where we can
8.48 be different
8.48 people and just grow together um and and
8.48 i i i&;ll tell you guys
8.48 the way that we can do this maintain a
8.48 life of prayer
8.48 maintain an open line of communication
8.48 and don&;t stop going to mass
8.48 go to mass together i highly recommend
8.48 it ellie and i go to match together by
8.48 ourselves we don&;t have to go with our
8.48 parents we don&;t have to go with our
8.48 friends with our brothers with our
8.48 sisters
8.48 we don&;t have to go do that we go by
8.48 ourselves and we grow together just like
8.48 that
8.48 and our conversations to and from are
8.48 always different
8.48 on our way too we might be talking about
8.48 one thing on the way back we might be
8.48 talking about the homily and how father
8.48 how father was great this weekend or
8.48 whatever it might be but
8.48 maintain that line of communication
8.48 maintain the life of prayer and maintain
8.48 a life of
8.48 of being present in the eucharist in the
8.48 holy mass
8.48 and i promise you it&;ll be easy it&;ll be
8.48 fruitful
8.48 and it&;ll be worth it thank you guys so
8.48 much uh we really had fun doing this uh
8.48 it
8.48 took us a lot longer what you guys are
8.48 seeing is a really edited version we&;ll
8.48 add some bloopers at the end of this but
8.48 thank you guys so much for listening
8.48 um it was really fun uh to really just
8.48 re revitalize that relationship that we
8.48 had that we have
8.48 promised each other um and to really go
8.48 back to what we were thinking about in
8.48 those ground rules and stuff like that
8.48 so
8.48 thank you guys for this opportunity to
8.48 share with you again my name is mark
8.48 gomez
8.48 hi i&;m ali this was very awkward to make
8.48 all right if you guys have any questions
8.48 about anything just let my mom know and
8.48 we&;ll
8.48 try to answer them as soon as possible
8.48 we could do a follow-up video we don&;t
8.48 have a problem with that so if you guys
8.48 have any questions just jot them down
8.48 give them to ms martinez and we can we
8.48 can go ahead and do this again
8.48 you
.
Cet article, qui traite du thème “information chasteté”, vous est spécialement suggéré par blog.chaste-t.com. La chronique est reproduite du mieux possible. Dans le cas où vous souhaitez apporter quelques précisions concernant le domaine de “information chasteté” vous pouvez solliciter notre rédaction. La destination de blog.chaste-t.com est de débattre de information chasteté dans la transparence en vous apportant la connaissance de tout ce qui est en lien avec ce sujet sur la toile Connectez-vous sur notre site blog.chaste-t.com et nos réseaux sociaux dans le but d’être informé des futures publications.